Watching the sun set on today, 12th of May, makes me emotional as it is days like this that I really feel how far I am from home.
My baby brother is turning 18 today.
Teddy came into my life when he was just 2 years old and to see him grow up into the wonderful young man that he’s become is something truly special.
When thinking about what I could gift him from so far away, I thought about what I could have found useful when I was turning 18 and so I’ve written this, from my heart to his.
I thought I would share it on here because maybe some others could use hearing it, too. Below are 18 reminders about tackling life as a young adult; things to think about and notes to remember, especially when you might be finding things hard.
As we are all on our own journeys of self discovery, it’s taken me some time to reach my level of understanding about how life can present challenges…I hope this can provide some guidance for those who may need it.
Feel free to share ♥️
It breaks my heart that I am not there to celebrate with you, Bear, to give you a cuddle and show you support in entering this next big chapter, but I am there in spirit and I am thinking of you.
May this year bring you all the health, love, peace and happiness that you truly deserve.
I love you and happy birthday ♥️
*****
There are some things we are born with and some things that we gain;
One of the best things I’ve been blessed with is you, my brother, Teddy James.
Today is a marker and your first step into adult life,
So get ready for the real ups and downs, the best bits and the strife.
It has been simply amazing to watch you grow up so fast
You’ve grown into a real gentleman and an all-round superstar!
I am so proud of you as you’re such a kind, handsome and intelligent young man
And whatever you want to achieve, make sure you never doubt you can!
Because the only person that will ever stop you is you
Make sure you remember that even during the times you feel most blue.
So now that you’re a man, I wanted to give you some loving advice…
(Even though you’re already a total delight!)
Because life is a journey and it’s important to get help sometimes
So here are 18 things for you to remember or to refer to time to time…
- Life is about doing what makes YOU happy…doing what other people tell you you ‘should do’ will only make you crappy and SNAPPY!! So make sure you use these years to discover what you truly adore… try everything out, don’t be afraid to give anything a go, otherwise in the long term you’ll be really bored!
- You are special and unique so never compare yourself… and don’t forget that you’re allowed to make mistakes, just like everyone else
- Although it’s important to learn from mistakes and take criticism on the chin…actively working on yourself should be constant, and make sure you do it with a grin!
- No one should love you more than you do so invest the majority of your time in YOU! So, make sure you look after your mind, body and soul – believe me, Bear, your peace and happiness are both in YOUR control.
- When other people hurt, upset or even reject you, it tends to be a reflection on them so don’t ever let others’ poor behaviour create doubt in you.
- Make sure you travel, see the world and learn from other cultures, don’t feel pressured to get sucked into a job full of corporate vultures! You have plenty of time to grow up and get serious later, for now, work should be fun and help you live a life you want – maybe take a bar job, or like I did, be a waiter.
- Always show respect for anyone you meet – you never know how you could affect someone’s day or even their week. Mental health problems or depression are on the rise and can sometimes be silenced and stigmatised, so it’s important that you know it’s okay to not feel happy 100% of the time. Treat everyone with love and always be kind. And trust me, Bear, that always applies, whether you have known them for just 5 minutes or an entire lifetime.
- We have so much to learn from each other; converse, engage and ask as many questions as you can…the more you manage to interact with, the more you will become a well-rounded man.
- Embrace your failures because they’re the things we learn from most…if everything is easy, you’ll never grow, only coast.
- Know your own value and don’t sell yourself short! People can only take advantage if you allow them to, give that some thought.
- Inspire, be inspired and keep yourself challenged…by doing this you will realise that peoples’ fears of embarrassment are invalid. Instead, you’ll learn to have fun in different ways and develop greater interests; as a result you’ll attract the right energies and develop the best new relationships.
- Only look back to see how far you’ve come – look forward to your future, don’t dwell on what you have or haven’t done.
- Communicate your feelings clearly for ultimate peace of mind, do this whilst always being honest and always being kind.
- Listen to your gut because it’s usually right, sometimes your emotions will make you lose sight. So take a step back, take some time and breathe, peel back your layers of feelings and listen carefully to what’s hiding underneath.
- Always stand by your morals, those you should never compromise…people with the strongest values are most respected and wise. This will mean you will feel pressured sometimes but know in your heart it’s important to stand up and be proud of what you know is right.
- Be forgiving because staying angry only holds hate in your heart; letting go of painful feelings really is an art. But you will see how freeing it is when it becomes something you master, as once you dilute anger, your heart can heal faster.
- Allow yourself to show vulnerability to those you regard as most important, the most valuable and strongest relationships will form when you are transparent. Don’t get me wrong, this may sometimes result in heartbreak or pain, but when you trust and take the risk, you have so much more to gain.
- Lastly, we are always learning and that’s something important to remember, it’s okay to not know everything, think of yourself as as a young ember; you are now growing into a beautiful and powerful flame, but your life will consist of constant work, so keep your fire burning, tend to your needs and take pride in your name.